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  • Writer's pictureColleen M. Doumeng

Using the word "Should" vs "Could"

How can I love myself a little more today?

I learned a very long time ago that the word "should" is one of the most damaging and violent words in our language! Every single time we use it we are in effect making ourselves "wrong", or we were "wrong", or we are going to be "wrong".

I was taught to remove the word "should" and replace it with "could."

Do I do it all the time - of course not. However, I am more aware of when I use the word "should."

What's even more interesting (and kind of funny) is how this week I noticed how many times I use it when I talk to my husband! I'm so bossy - "you should do this -or "you shouldn't do that!!" Ugh!

The word "could" gives us a choice.

And then, we're never wrong.

Think of three things that you "should" do.

Then replace "should" with "could."

Now ask, "why haven't I?"

How many "shoulds" can you drop from your list?

Remember, we are always perfect and we are doing the best we can with the understanding we have in this moment.

Sending you peace and love from Long Island, New York.

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