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  • Writer's pictureColleen M. Doumeng

Self Love Challenge - Forgiveness


When we find ourselves feeling stuck in situations, or when our affirmations aren’t working, Louise Hay teaches it usually means that there’s more forgiveness work to be done.

I meet so many people who feel stuck. In fact, before I learned how to meditate, I was one of them. I AM learning now how to master forgiveness ~ learning - practicing -

“When you don’t flow freely with life in the present moment, it usually means that you’re holding on to a past moment. It can be regret, sadness, hurt, fear, guilt, blame, anger, resentment, or sometimes even a desire for revenge. Each one of these states comes from a space of unforgiveness, a refusal to let go and come in to the present moment. Only in the present moment can you create your future. “

“Fear”, “regret” and “resentment” are fires that burn within me. I didn’t realize until now that it relates to me not forgiving someone or something that happened. Clearly I need to go deeper on this. I will look at it through Louise’s lens of forgiveness.

“If you’re holding on to the past, you can’t be in the present. It’s only in this “now” moment that your thoughts and words are powerful. So you really don’t want to waste your current thoughts by continuing to create your future from the garbage of the past. “

Before I learned how to meditate I brought tons of garbage from my past into the present moment.

“When you blame another, you give your own power away because you’re placing the responsibility for your feelings on someone else. “

This is such a powerful teaching. My self talk during these moments is “take your power back Colleen! Take your power back! Don’t speak. Don’t be reactive. Reflect. Introduce the pattern interrupt breath. Reach for SODA (stop. observe. Detach. Ascend). The Three Gates! Breathe. In and out.

“People in your life may behave in ways that trigger uncomfortable responses in you. However, they didn’t get into your mind and create the buttons that have been pushed. Taking responsibility for your own feelings and reactions is mastering your “ability to respond.” In other words, you learn to consciously choose rather than simply react. “

Whoop there it is again ~ those words of wisdom~

Mastering. Responsibility. Emotional intelligence. Conscious choice making Becoming reflective not reactive.

“Forgiveness is a tricky and confusing concept for many people, but know that there’s a difference between forgiveness and acceptance. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that you condone their behavior! The act of forgiveness takes place in your own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person. The reality of true forgiveness lies in setting yourself free from the pain. It’s simply an act of releasing yourself from the negative energy that you’ve chosen to hold on to.”

Great advice. Doesn’t mean I accept the behavior.

Most of the people I have forgiven have no idea that I forgave them.

And I know Louise is right.

This act of forgiveness has freed me from negative energy and physical pain ~ I use to be a person who had migraines and countless sleepless nights! Use to be. Key words for me. Then I learned how to meditate 🙏

“Also, forgiveness doesn’t mean allowing the painful behaviors or actions of another to continue in your life. Sometimes forgiveness means letting go: You forgive that person and then you release them. Taking a stand and setting healthy boundaries is often the most loving thing you can do—not only for yourself, but for the other person as well. “

I love healthy boundaries. Mastering how to create them instead of building walls around my heart is a different lesson.

Affirmation ~ Today is a very exciting time in your life. You are on a wonderful adventure and will never go through this particular process again

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